Interview with Kathleen Smith

July 26, 2016 | Kathleen Smith is a young counselor who blogs at https://fangirltherapy.com/, but also published her book "The Fangirl Life" recently with Penguin Random House. Her articles have been published by The Mary Sue, xoJane and HelloGiggles as well as magazines for mental health. She lives in Washington D.C. and we were able to ask her some questions regarding the fangirl life. On her blog, you can take a quiz to find out which fangirl type you are – but what about the fanboys …?.

German translation of the interview.

Foto: Kathleen Smith - Copyright: Kathleen Smith
Kathleen Smith
© Kathleen Smith

Your credo is that fangirls should never change. But why a therapy - to accept?

The fangirl nature is a beautiful trait that shouldn't make us feel ashamed. We're active participants in our passions, and we build communities where we make wonderful friends. But we're also humans, and by definition humans are unfinished creatures. I'm a counselor, and counseling is all about celebrating and using our strengths to live full and brave lives. So I wanted to write a book that would celebrate the fangirl but also challenge her to see how to use her passions for self-improvement.

How do you notice when "casually watching a show" turns into "obsession"? For me it's a creeping feeling in my stomach and loads of denial.

Yes, the creepy stomach feeling usually means something! For me I think when I get anxious when I miss an episode, or upset with people in the fandom who disagree with me, or jealous of other people's experiences with the cast or the show, then I know that it's probably time to take a step back and take some deep breaths. I strive to find that happy middle, where I'm active and enthusiastic about the plot and the characters but also able to focus my attention elsewhere when needed.

In all the years of you blogging - which reader's question stuck with you the most?

Once I had a reader write very candidly to me that deep down she didn't think she deserved to live the kind of courageous life she observed in the fictional women she loved. I think that kind of self-doubt can be present in all of our minds, and I really held that young woman's question in my heart when I was writing the book. I wanted people to read "The Fangirl Life" and feel like they got a little nudge towards being braver and kinder to themselves and others.

How did you come up with your book idea and did it immediately click with your publisher?

I got the idea to combine my two passions - fangirling and mental health - several years ago, and I sat down and wrote all my thoughts down during National Novel Writing Month, NaNoWriMo. I was very fortunate to find an editor who is also a fangirl and connected with the message of the book, and we definitely bonded over the topic.

Fangirls, huh? What about them boys?

You know, I think there are a lot of texts out there that address mental health in communities where fanboys flock. I wanted to write a book that addresses some of the fangirl passions and problems that young women face both online and offline, because this has been my experience. I don't feel qualified to address the fanboy experience when 99% of the people in my fan communities identify as female. But that doesn't mean I don't think someone regardless of how they identify couldn't glean advice from the book. A lot of the techniques are evidence-based, sort of common sense mental health practices that apply to anyone.

Foto: Copyright: TarcherPerigee
© TarcherPerigee

There are a lot of theories re: straight women shipping gay boys, one of them being from a scientific text "not sharing their hero with another woman". What's your explanation?

Why people ship who they ship has always fascinated me! I have no clue why some women gravitate towards gay ships, and others don't. I will say that I doubt it has anything to do with not wanting to share. I mean, they have to share their hero with the entire fandom, right? So I think they're pretty good at that. My ships usually involve at least one woman. I basically ship whatever actress I'm crying about at the time and whoever is smart enough to worship her!

You love BAMFs - for those of us not aware, what are they and why are they awesome?

I think BAMF has many definitions across fandom, but I use it to describe a badass female character who is really confident in her identity. She's willing to make bold moves and not be compromised by what people think, but she's also willing and able to be vulnerable in her relationships. A BAMF is basically a character who makes me stop and take notes, and see how I can apply some of that awesomeness to my own life.


Fandom has its own language with headcanons and BroTPs and such ... how to explain all of that to "outsiders"?

Very patiently! I've had a lot of friends and family who aren't familiar with the language of fandom picked up my book and try to teach themselves. Fortunately I included a glossary in the back, and it's easy to search and find definitions on the internet. I do think, however, that a lot of the language is becoming more common among younger people. Most teenagers definitely know what "shipping" is.

What's the future of fandom (with Netflix and such)?

I think one change we're seeing now is the level of involvement that actors have with a fandom. There's a lot of pressure to create social media accounts, to live tweet during episodes, and to attend events to meet fans. This is exciting for many fans, but personally I like to keep some separation between fictional characters and a celebrity. I'm actually grateful that most of my favorites are not on social media.

What's the most important thing a tv show taught you?

Oh my goodness, what a question! In the book I talk about how I owe my career to marathoning five seasons of "The Good Wife" in a few weeks. One of my favorite characters, Diane Lockhart, played by Christine Baranski, has this scene where she's negotiating her salary and she says, "I want what I’m worth." When I watched the show I was in graduate school and doing a lot of free labor, and that moment was really powerful for me. It helped me start really examining my own value and not let people take advantage of my time or my talents. So I'm incredibly grateful for the way that story intervened in my own life.

Simone Bauer - myFanbase

Note: © myFanbase 2016 - The interview is exclusive to myFanbase and may not be published on other websites or the like. You may share the first two questions (up to 180 words) if you link back to this site. Translations other than English and German may be posted with full credit including the link to this site.
Foto: Copyright: TarcherPerigee
© TarcherPerigee